“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us” (2 Corinthians 4:7, NIV 1984).
Even though it was my day off, I ran into the hospital this morning to see a friend admitted for atrial fibrillation. Taking additional time there to catch up on some work, I still had control of my day. But as I was finishing up at my computer, a friend I pray regularly for called and wanted to meet me for coffee and concerns. I accepted but was frustrated because I had already squeezed the margin out of my morning, and now I would be time-pressured for the rest of my day off.
Then God spoke, “Didn’t you ask me this morning to empty you and fill you with me, so that the broken might be made whole? Isn’t this man broken?”
Be careful what you ask for.
How can I be so sincere in my prayer life and then totally out of spirit when God presents Himself with opportunity for His kingdom?
Why was I not thrilled for God to use me in the life of this man for whom I was praying?
From where comes this disconnect between my very deep beliefs, very sincere prayers and my daily living?
Why don’t I fully live what I desperately believe?
It’s not like I am newly aware of my contradictory behavior. I’ve lived too long to be surprised at my inconsistencies---but I am quite perturbed with them.
How can I finally change?
I know of little I can do to authenticate my life other than to seek Him sincerely, surrender my disconnected life to be filled by His spirit, worship in community, obey when I hear and trust that He can work out His best within my inconsistent living.
I’m betting my life that He can.
Praise your name that you can use even me to magnify your glory.