Beyond the Curtain

“Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10, NIV 2011).

I was standing on my tiptoes behind the sterile field on the anesthesia side of the table today, giving my calves a good workout as I peered over the curtain. As a medical student, I'd read about open-heart surgery and I'd listened to the anesthesiologist and cardiothoracic surgeon explain the procedure to me beforehand. But now I saw a chest cut open and the heart beating right before my eyes—a student witnessing a master surgeon at work replacing a heart valve.

You can only stand there doing nothing for so long before your mind wanders, and mine wandered into prayer. God reminded me that He is our master surgeon. We hear about Him, read about Him and seek to peer over the curtain of our lives to see what He's doing. But rarely do we actually have the opportunity to see exactly what He's up to.

Today I was reminded: If I could peer over the curtain, I would see God working meticulously on my heart. He removes things—good things, bad things, in-between things—to replace them with something better, something more life-giving, more eternal. I rarely have had the opportunity to see and understand His work while He was doing it, but I can look back at His track record in my life and rest, knowing my heart and my life have been, are and will be in good hands. He is faithful even when we're faithless. He is a God of miracles. The God who makes hearts beat, who keeps you alive while you sleep, who wakes you up each morning...that's my God! Miracle worker every day.

So friends, if you feel the scalpel cutting you, if you feel like a part of you has been ripped out, if you feel like your past is too strong, if you feel like there's no hope for your future: TAKE HEART. Jesus is the master heart surgeon, and even if you cannot see beyond the curtain of your life, you can know that your heart is in good hands. The surgical pain is certainly real, but it is also purposeful. It's accomplishing something whether or not you see it in the moment. His scalpel is not wasted. In His OR, every operation has a 100 percent success rate. He is the master surgeon and He is also the universal donor of life-giving blood. When you heal, you will be better than before...and the scars that remain will be a blessed reminder that Jesus closed your wounds and brought you from death into LIFE.

Roshini Isabell Selladurai, MS3, IUSM

Dear God,
Help me remember that you are my master surgeon, that your scalpel is working to bring me close to you and make me whole and that I can trust you in every area of my life.
Amen